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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 5/19/2010
Posts: 384
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Hi All
Sitting here tearful and angry, this bloody awful disease.
This is the first time I have had to give in to it. My husband had to drive my foster boy to school today and collect some shopping. I have just had to phone work and say that I can't come in as I can't drive and lift my arm as my right shoulder is playing up, I've got an abcess under my left armpit and I'm falling to pieces.
When I phoned and told work I couldn't come in she said "oh Anne thats not like you, you must be poorly" well thats when I started crying " I find it very hard to accept sympathy.
The boys beds need changing theres ironing to do and I'm just sitting waffling on here.
I keep visulising myself in a pissy chair in an old peoples home.
I've got an appointment at the doctors tomorrow, surely the MTX should start to kick in again soon. I was taken off for two weeks because of liver problems.
Well I'm gonna go and have a coffee and fag and try and pull myself together.
Anne x
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 11/20/2010 Posts: 244 Location: Cornwall
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Hi Anne,
So sorry you're having a rough time, I know how frustrated you must be and you're quite entitled to your moments. I had one yesterday when it took me far too long to grip and insert a feminine hygeine product (sorry guys its a girl thing). I wish people would stop being 'nice' to me as well, just treat me normally I scream in my head!
So the boys aren't going to catch anything if you don't change their beds, it will do them good to do it themselves. Nobody is going to be rude enough to comment on an un-ironed shirt and you've helped to save the planet by not turning the iron on. Go on laugh! I have the same vision in the old people's home but I'm also causing havoc, flirting with all the men, sneaking in bottles of bacardi and generally behaving badly!
I'm going to do the same coffee and fag thing now in sympathy with you and try again to pull myself together too! I find the odd slap round the face helpful as well.
If you've got sunshine on frost enjoy it and your restful day, you've earnt it.
Sara
x
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 8/25/2010 Posts: 1,289 Location: Buckinghamshire
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hi Annie,
really feel for you reading this.
i had to take my Methotrexate along with my Hydroxy for the first time this morning ( having started the Hydroxy on Tuesday ) and i honestly thought i couldn't do it ... thinking how much Toxins can a body take.
also i'd stripped the bed and i always tumble dry it and iron it all in the same morning as i hate ironing piling up and it all got on top of me. i made myself do the ironing and then took myself off to a friends for a cuppa just home to get myself out of feeling like this.
and i thought my feet were going to seize up with the cold when i went out and i went in the car.
give yourself a me day and try and chill and watch some tele ... you have an abcess as well which can be painful.
don't feel guilty and the beds can wait.
take care of yourself,
Suzanne x
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 5/19/2010
Posts: 384
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Thank you both for your kind words.
But no I couldn't give into it which probably shows I havn't come to terms with RA. I am not trying to be a martyr as my husband and boys wouldn't notice if the housework etc hadn't been done but I would know. The beds have now been done although it took me 45 mins.
I really do need to get my sense of humour back, I have been a miserable cow lately, but my sense of humour is normally at the benefit of other people.
A good few years back I set my husband up for the programme "Don't try this at home" with Davina McCall. They flew us both to Australia and he had to abseil then bunjee jump down the side of a mountain. Don't think I'm up for anything like that again at the moment.
Coming on here and having a chat is great, it really helps, already feel much better.
Anne x
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 8/25/2010 Posts: 1,289 Location: Buckinghamshire
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hi Annie,
i'm the same really ... i don't give in to it hence me doing my bed as well, can't practice what i preach.
i also felt i was putting things on hold i.e. we weren't going out in the evenings etc. although prefer spring/summer for that, i do go out in the day as much as possible with Hubby at weekends as well as my normal day to day routine of going out on my own.
so i've booked to see a couple of shows at our Theatre which is a fabulous one in February and June. also going to see the Panto at Christmas where the whole family goes.
went to see Jane McDonald last summer and Strictly Come Dancing which was fab.
what a wonderful experience you must have had out in Australia ... yep life must go on eh,
as my GP always says to me when i cry in a heap this is a controllable condition and i just have to believe him !!
glad you're feeling a bit better,
Suzanne x
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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Hi Annie,
Wow, I bet you had a great time in Australia!
Sorry things are so bad for you at the moment. I'm the same if anyone is kind to me, it makes me cry! I think we are so used to just getting on with things and are not used to people being kind to us!
Hope you feel better soon.
Love, Doreen xx
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 3/8/2010 Posts: 914
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Hi Anne, So sorry to hear you are feeling so low, and all aches and pains. I too awoke this morning with a really painful neck and shoulder, to the point I could not turn my head to the left. It has eased a bit since my shower, but I too am in a rut. I don't ache too much, either that or I ignore too much.  At the moment I feel like I am floating along in someone else's life. Sometimes I feel I just cant get motivated try as I might. I also spent a weepy day yesterday, so you are not alone we have all been there. I wish I could go back to Furteventura and stay there until the spring........ I wish  Would certainly help. Hope you pick up soon the weather is meant to brighten, here's hoping. Take care Lorna x
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 838 Location: Nottinghamshire
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If there is one thing that I have learnt regardless of having RA is that housework is not the be all and end all of everything. What doesn't get done can wait, there is more to life than worrying about a bit of dust or crumbs on the carpets!!!
I know what you mean about giving into it. I had to do this earlier this year. Daughter was going to take me to London on the train, do a bit of shopping and then go and have a look around Buckingham Palace. I was so looking forward to it. When the time came to book train tickets and the palace I had to tell her not to. I just couldn't face the journey, all the walking etc. I just didn't want her to pay for everything and then when the day came I couldn't go.
I remember very well when I was at my worst thinking that if anything happened to my husband and I didn't get any better I would end up in a nursing home. Terrible thought that was as well.
RA us such a roller coaster of a ride, up and down, then up again. Totally unpredicatable.........I think we just have to enjoy the good spells and then manage the best we can when things go pear shaped.
Tomorrow is another day.
Hope you get something sorted at your GP's
Take care
Paula x
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 1,524 Location: W. Yorkshire
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Aw Anne  YES I'VE CHANGED, PAIN DOES THAT TO PEOPLE.
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,006 Location: Timperley
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Hi Anne
Sorry things are so bad at the moment.
As you have an abcess, you obviously have an infection somewhere, and this will raise your temp and make you feel even worse. I think you should see the GP if you haven't already done so.
Take care and hope you seeon feel much better.
Love Jeanxxx
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 4/20/2010 Posts: 1,749 Location: Somerset
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Hello Anne,
Poor you. I think everyone before me has said it all, so sorry that you
not well at the mo. Try and rest to give your body a rest.
We all do too much and know we shouldn't I am one of the worst people
for that and regret it the day after. It makes me touchy and I take it
out on my Husband and then I have to apology for being is horrid.
Treat yourself to a manicure or massage always makes me feel better
Rose
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,689 Location: Durham
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Hi Anne, Try not to be too hard on yourself - what with the horrible RA and a nasty abscess you have a lot on your plate right now. Hope you feel better very soon. Kathleen x
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009
Posts: 336
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Dear Anne, I'm sorry that you are feeling so rough. It's so rotten when it gets you like that. I get through times like this by trying to think about good things I have done and planing things to do on better days. the better days don't always work out but it does help me to stay positive. Try to get some rest. Glenys.
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009
Posts: 2,127
Location: Thornton Cleveleys
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Hi Anne Hope things improve very soon. Don't be too hard on yourself you're doing brilliantly and everyone has off days/weeks every now and again. Try to relax a little and just for a couple of days let someone else do the doing. It's not 'giving in' it's being sensible ... really! Do get that abscess looked at, if you haven't already. Nasty blighters can really make you feel poorly. Take care Anne Lyn x PS I have just read that you've been to the doctors re abscess and subsequent palaver. Hope it settles soon.
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,006 Location: Timperley
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Are you feeling better today? xx
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 5/19/2010
Posts: 384
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Hi Jean
Went to the doctors tonight for general checkup, he was more interested in the abcess, he phoned the hospital to get me in tonight but they are to busy, so I'm checked in tomorrow morning at 7.30am for a general anethsetic and drainage, he wouldn't do it as he said it was to deep and would be to painful.
Thanks for caring.
Anne x
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,006 Location: Timperley
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Hi Anne
No wonder you are feeling so dreadful. I'm so sorry you have this to cope with on top of the RA. We will be thinking about you tommorow and, hopefully, after the op. you will start to pick up. Try and get a good rest tonight.
Love Jean xxxx
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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Good luck for tomorrow Anne.
Hope it all goes well.
Love, Doreen xx
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 4/20/2010 Posts: 1,749 Location: Somerset
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Thinking of your tomorrow Anne. Good luck
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 1,035
Location: in a house
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ohh come on you be allright . i was once falling to bits and MTX has got me going again don,t give up christine The chocolate eating housewife ...The washer woman .....naughty lady
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